This was a very good day. It combined many positive elements to make up a full package of good stuff. I visited Ray's studio in the afternoon to look at some of his recent paintings. He is a superb painter who's representational art reveals an extraordinary technique and a visual vocabulary that I envy. He has started painting abstract expressionist works that are much harder for me to relate to. Still, I could see the progress in his work as he evolved from fairly basic imagery to ever more complex work. The increasing complexity has resulted in some very fine paintings.
Then he came back to my place for dinner, conversation and some telly. I gave him my calendar for Christmas, that he opened immediately. Ray was always difficult to give anything to. He has little interest in most material things and no desire to collect stuff. Occasionally I've pleased him with an art book or a specific CD, but overall my gifts have left little impression. Not so this time. He loved the calendar, studying it carefully, commenting on the juxtaposition of images, layout fonts etc. He was immensely pleased. I couldn't disguise my glee at finally giving a present he liked.
We are older now, and we have mellowed since we were together before. He was very wise to move away to Deep River six years ago. That distance ended my obsession and gave him some perspective. It's such an easy relaxed friendship now that the sexual tension is gone. He is the only man I really like much more than I loved. We know all our foibles from our old relationship but we accept each other more in this new friendship. Nothing is at stake now and nobody needs to win. I like the easy way we are together and I'm grateful for our second chance. Old dogs do learn new tricks it seems.
